For most of us, our relationships to our parents were probably mixed--with some positive experiences, and some not so much.
We may have known our biological parents consciously and experientially because they raised us and we spent lots of time with them. For some of us, our parents may have died when we were young, or abandoned us in some way. We may have been raised by adopted parents, other relatives, or other people charged with taking care of us.
Despite how we may have viewed the situations at the time, our relationship with our parents provide us with many opportunities for self-reflection, growth, forgiveness, and self-exploration.
Many of us perhaps spend much of our entire lives trying to heal the wounds of our childhood, or trying to forget about or compensate for the challenging situations we experienced growing up.
We may think we've "outgrown" the challenging conditions we experienced with our parents, but have we really?
Looked at from a larger spiritual perspective, the relationships we have with our parents provide us with an immense personal growth opportunity. If we're experiencing lack or limitation in any areas of life right now--money, career, other relationships, inner peace and fulfillment--looking at clearing and resolving our past relationships, particularly with our parents, is of primary importance.
Spirit tells us that 100% of the time, we choose our parents. Our parents never choose us, but we (the children) always choose them.
You might ask: "if I had a choice in the matter, why did I choose my particular parents?"
Remember that we come into this physical incarnation to grow and evolve. We didn't come here to simply have a reasonably pleasant time, have a few reasonable life experiences, and then die.
We are literally here for the purpose of healing our lives, and shining the Light of Spirit that is within us as fully as possible out into the lives of others in service.
We are here to heal and clear ourselves, and we are here to raise all of humanity up.
Our parents provide us with the primary karmic fodder for the work we are to do in this life, both in terms of the seemingly positive things they did for us, and the things that seem negative.
What seemed positive in our relationships to our parents was a nudge and movement in the direction of our soul's purpose, and what seemed negative are the growth areas we need to heal and resolve in our own lives so that we can express the full measure of our purpose.
I have noticed with many of my clients, that when there are blocks coming up for them around any area of life--money, career, romantic relationship, and even health challenges--there are often many unresolved issues present they are still carrying from their primary relationships of life, especially their parents.
Remember, looked at symbolically, our relationships to our parents are not things to be judged, dismissed, or swept under the rug emotionally, somehow pretending our unresolved issues were never there at all, or are resolved even if they aren't.
There is tremendous spiritual gold to be mined from our relationships with our parents if we know how to look for it.
Once we accept that we chose these beings to be the primary karmic impetus for us to get onto our life path (no matter how the surface mind wants to judge the situation), we can start to have much more respect and honor for who are parents are/were in our lives, and we can take positive steps to receive those lessons now.
Remember: Spiritually speaking, it doesn't matter if you ever knew your parents, or even if they are currently physically alive. Clearing work can and must be done with these relationships even if the other person has passed on.
Remember also that, in most cases, we have also had hundreds of past lives with our parents. So our relationships with them didn't just begin with our physical conception/birth in this life. Sometimes, quite a tremendous amount of heavy karma has gone down in these relationships in the past, and so there may be a lot to clear for you to feel free now.
Our parents have been our past-life lovers, parents, children, perpetrators, victims, and have often harmed us deeply (as we have also harmed them), including being responsible for our deaths. So there is a lot to clear.
There is a precise way I've developed to assess the current "level of consciousness" of our relationship with our parents (or really any relationship we have had). This method can give us an exact numerical callibration of where our relative level of karmic freedom is at in any relationship, especially our parents. This method of callibration is based on David Hawkins' scale of consciousness, which extends from 0 (the lowest energies in human consciousness such as shame and guilt) to 1000 (perfect human consciousness or enlightenment).
The higher the number (or level of consciousness) of our relationship with our parents, the greater degree we have resolved all present-life and past-life issues with them and the greater degree we are experiencing our natural spiritual freedom to be who we truly are.
The minimum level of consciousness I like to work on clearing relationships to on this scale of consciousness is 350, which is a relatively high vibration, and correponds to the level of forgiveness and acceptance. When your relationship with anyone vibrates at 350 or above, you feel the release, forgiveness, and harmonization in your heart, and your spirit feels lifted above the negativity of the past.
Most relationships do not initially callibrate that high, but may start to more and more after 1 or 2 clearing sessions (depending on the heaviness of the unresolved karmic "weight" of the relationship).
Many relationships with parents initially callibrate at 0-30, which are the karmic levels of shame and guilt. Sometimes they initially callibrate at around 50, which will make you feel the vibration of discouragement, giving up, estranged, depressed, unfulfilled, life is meaningless, and "I am doomed".
A bit higher than that are the levels of 100, which are associated with the karmic weight of fear, and the belief that "danger is everywhere", also feelings of anxiety and restlessness.
The callibration of anger begins to show up at 150. For many of us, unresolved anger is the primary way our subconscious relates to past relationships, especially our parents. Yes, anger is actually a higher evolutionary callibration than shame, guilt, or fear--so it's a movement in the right direction, but should not be a long-term stopping point.
Only when we reach the levels of 200 and above in our personal vibration and in our relationship vibrations do we begin to experience true healing. 200 is associated with the courage to walk our spiritual path and to make positive changes in our lives. This is the callibration of "I can do it", where we begin to get excited about life, and begin to feel productive and like we can take empowered, constructive action.
By the time our relationship level of consciousness reached 350, we are starting to feel true resolution and peace about our path. We are experiencing true forgivness.
Many people don't understand what forgiveness means vibrationally. True forgiveness doesn't mean forgetting about the past, condoning inappropriate behavior, or pretending our relationship didn't hurt it, but it simply means letting go of the pain of the past that is still alive within us, so that we can experience true peace, fulfillment, harmony, and freedom in the present.
What you can do now:
First and most important is: you can make a decision that you will endeavor to fully forgive and release everyone in your life, past and present, so that you can be free, and so that you can free them to resolve their own issues.
For many people, forgiveness work can't simply be done on a conscious level. It has to be done by resolving the past-life components as well. Once those components are resolved, it makes it much easier for us to see the person and situation clearly and to step into consciously blessing everything and everyone. This is where past-life clearing work comes in.
I have laid out a lot of information in this email. If you feel ready to dive in to begin clearing out all the unresolved karma between you and your parents (or any relationship), please book a clearing with the links below. An hour-long clearing will generally give us enough time to do an initialy clearing for between 1-3 individuals in your life, depending on how much your souls are ready to clear on the day of the clearing.
If you have worked with me before, then generally a 30 minute clearing will be enough for us to focus on 1-2 relationships for clearing.
If you feel ready to take immediate action on clearing relationship karma, but want to connect with me first about the level of consciousness you current have with a particular relationship, please email me. Please only write me to ask for this information if you are ready to take immediate action.